الفصل الرابع والعشرون

الفصل الرابع والعشرون

Now it must be told: Wu Song turned around and, seeing the man, threw himself to the ground and bowed. The man turned out to be none other than Wu Song's own elder brother, Wu Da. When Wu Song had finished bowing, he said, "It's been over a year since I've seen you, Brother. How is it that you're here?"

Wu Da said, "Second Brother, you've been gone all this time—why didn't you send me a single letter? I've resented you and missed you."

Wu Song asked, "How can you say you resent me and miss me?"

Wu Da said, "When I resent you, it's because back in Qinghe County you would often get drunk and pick fights, and you were constantly involved in lawsuits. You made me follow you to the magistrate's office to await proceedings, and there wasn't a single peaceful month. You caused me constant suffering—that's why I resent you. When I miss you, it's because recently I took a wife, but the people of Qinghe County had no respect for me and all came to bully me, with no one to stand up for me. When you was home, who would have dared to fart in my presence? Now I couldn't stay there any longer, so I've moved here to rent a house—that's why I miss you."

Now let me tell you: Wu Da and Wu Song were actually born of the same mother. Wu Song stood eight feet tall, with a commanding appearance; his whole body possessed the strength of a thousand pounds—otherwise, how could he have killed that great tiger? As for Wu Da, he stood no more than five feet, with an ugly face and a ridiculous look. The people of Qinghe County, seeing how short and small he was, gave him the nickname "Three-Inch-Ding Gu Shu Pi" (Three-Inch Ding, Grain-Tree Bark).

In Qinghe County there was a wealthy household with a maidservant whose name was Pan Jinlian. She was just over twenty years of age and rather comely. Because the master of that household wanted to take her, the maidservant went and reported it to the mistress, determined not to submit. The master held a grudge against her because of this, but he provided her with a dowry and gave her to Wu Da in marriage without costing him a single copper.

After Wu Da took that woman as his wife, several lecherous young scamps in Qinghe County came to harass them at their home. The truth was, the woman found Wu Da short and small, shabby and vulgar, and no good at romance. That woman had many good qualities, but above all she loved to steal men. There is a poem to prove it:

Jinlian's beauty deserves all praise—

Her brows like spring hills, knitted in a frown.

Had she met a refined and gallant man,

She'd have shared the clouds and rain without delay.

Now after Pan Jinlian came to the household, Wu Da, being a meek and honest man, was constantly harassed by these men who would stand in front of his door and shout, "A fine piece of mutton, fallen into the mouth of a dog!" Because of this, Wu Da could no longer stay in Qinghe County. He moved to Yanggu County, to Purple Stone Street, where he rented a house, and each day he still went out selling his steamed buns.

On this very day he was doing business in front of the county offices when he saw Wu Da. Wu Da said, "Brother, a few days ago I heard people in the street saying loudly, 'A valiant man who killed a tiger on Jingyang Ridge, surnamed Wu, has been appointed by the county magistrate as a chief constable.' I guessed eight parts that it was you, and now at last I've run into you today. Let me stop my business—I'll go home with you."

Wu Song asked, "Where is your house, Brother?"

Wu Da pointed and said, "It's right ahead on Purple Stone Street." Wu Song took up Wu Da's carrying pole, and Wu Da led him, turning this way and that, straight toward Purple Stone Street.

After making two turns, they came to a tea shop next door. Wu Da called out, "Elder Sister-in-law, open the door!" From behind the reed curtain a woman emerged and said from beneath the curtain, "Husband, why are you back so early?"

Wu Da said, "Your brother-in-law is here—come and meet him."

Wu Da took the carrying pole inside and then came out and said, "Second Brother, come inside and meet your sister-in-law." Wu Song lifted the curtain and went in to meet the woman. Wu Da said, "Elder Sister-in-law, the man who killed the great tiger on Jingyang Ridge and was just appointed as chief constable—he is this brother of mine."

The woman folded her hands and stepped forward, saying, "Uncle, may you have ten thousand blessings."

Wu Song said, "Sister-in-law, please sit down."

Wu Song then pushed the golden mountain and toppled the jade pillar, bowing his head to the ground. The woman stepped forward and supported him, saying, "Uncle, you overwhelm this humble one."

Wu Song said, "Sister-in-law, please accept my bow."

The woman said, "This humble one also heard people say, 'A hero who killed a tiger has been welcomed to the county offices.' I was just about to go and have a look, but I went too late, missed it, and didn't get to see him. So it was you, Uncle. Please, Uncle, come upstairs and sit down."

When Wu Song looked at the woman, he saw:

Her brows were like the willow leaves of early spring, ever laden with the sorrow of rain and clouds;

Her face was like the peach blossoms of the third month, concealing within it the charm of wind and moon.

Her slender waist swayed gently, making swallows seem idle and orioles languid;

Her sandalwood mouth was light and graceful, enough to drive bees wild and make butterflies mad.

Her jade-like beauty was so enchanting that flowers could speak of it;

Her graceful, delicate fragrance was such that even jade seemed to come alive.

At that moment the woman told Wu Da to invite Wu Song upstairs, and they took their seats as host and guest.

The three of them went upstairs and sat together. The woman looked at Wu the Elder and said, "I'll keep company with Uncle here. You go and prepare some food and wine for him." Wu the Elder replied, "Very well. Second Brother, sit a moment and I'll be back shortly." Wu the Elder went downstairs. Upstairs, the woman looked at Wu Song and his fine bearing, and thought to herself: "Wu Song and he are full brothers, born of the same mother, and he's grown so tall and strong. If I'd married a man like this, I wouldn't have lived my life for nothing! But look at my 'three-inch-tall mulberry-bark tree'—three parts human, seven parts ghost—I'm truly cursed with bad luck! They say Wu Song has even killed a tiger with his bare hands, so he must have tremendous strength. ...And they say he's not married yet. Why not have him move in with us?... Who would have thought this chance would come to me right here!"

The woman put on a smiling face and asked Wu Song, "Uncle, how many days have you been here?" Wu Song replied, "I've been here a little over ten days." The woman said, "Where do you stay?" Wu Song said, "For now I'm lodging at the county yamen." The woman said, "Uncle, that's really not proper." Wu Song said, "I'm alone and easy to manage. Soldiers attend me morning and night." The woman said, "How can those sorts of men properly look after Uncle? Why not move into our home? If you need some soup or water during the day, I'll prepare it myself for you—that would be far better than leaving it to those filthy fellows. Even if you drank just a simple broth, you could rest easy." Wu Song said, "I'm deeply grateful to you, Sister-in-law." The woman said, "Surely there's no wife of yours elsewhere whom we could bring here to meet you?" Wu Song said, "I have never married." The woman asked again, "How old are you, Uncle?" Wu Song said, "Twenty-five, going on twenty-six." The woman said, "That makes you three years older than me. Where have you come from this time?" Wu Song said, "I stayed in Cangzhou for over a year. I thought my brother was still living in Qinghe County, never imagining he'd moved here." The woman said, "It's a long story! Ever since I married your brother, he's been too kind-hearted for his own good and got bullied by others. We couldn't stay in Qinghe County any longer, so we moved here. If I'd had a husband as strong and mighty as you, Uncle, who would dare say a word against us!" Wu Song said, "My brother has always been honest and steady—nothing like me, rough as I am." The woman laughed and said, "Why put it that way? As the saying goes, 'A man without firm bones can't stand firm in this world.' I've always been straightforward and spirited—I can't stand men who won't answer three times, or who turn their whole bodies away the fourth time." Wu Song said, "My brother has never been one to cause trouble, so there's no need for you to worry, Sister-in-law."

They were still talking upstairs when Wu the Elder returned with wine, meat, and fruit, which he put in the kitchen. He came upstairs and called out, "Wife, come down and fix things." The woman replied, "Look at this clueless man! Uncle is sitting here, and he wants me to leave him and come down." Wu Song said, "Please, Sister-in-law, do as you wish." The woman said, "Why not just ask old Mother Wang next door to arrange everything? This is really too inconsiderate!"

Wu the Elder went himself and asked the neighboring old woman Wang to prepare the meal. When she had set everything out properly, they carried it upstairs and laid it on the table—nothing but fish, meat, fruit, and vegetables—and the wine was poured. Wu the Elder had the woman take the seat of honor, Wu Song sat opposite, and Wu the Elder took the side seat. The three sat down, and Wu the Elder poured wine before each of them. The woman raised her cup and said, "Uncle, don't think poorly of us for the meager hospitality—please, have a cup of wine." Wu Song said, "I thank you, Sister-in-law—please don't say such things." Wu the Elder busied himself pouring and serving wine and paid no attention to anything else. The woman, all smiles, kept saying, "Uncle, why don't you eat some fish and meat?" She picked out the best pieces and passed them to him. Wu Song was a straightforward man and treated her simply as his elder brother's wife. But the woman had been a servant girl in her youth and knew all the little ways of flattery. Wu the Elder, for his part, was gentle and weak and had no idea how to manage people. After the woman had drunk a few cups, her eyes stayed fixed on Wu Song. Wu Song found her gaze too much and lowered his head, taking no notice. That day they drank more than ten cups of wine, and then Wu Song rose to leave. Wu the Elder said, "Second Brother, have a few more cups before you go." Wu Song said, "This will do for now—I'll come visit you again soon." They all saw him downstairs. The woman said, "You must move in with us, Uncle. If you don't, people will laugh at your brother and me—blood brothers shouldn't be treated like strangers. Elder Brother, prepare a room and have Uncle come live with us. Don't let the neighbors talk." Wu the Elder said, "What my wife says is right. Second Brother, move in—it'll give me some pride too." Wu Song said, "Since my brother and sister-in-law insist, I'll bring my things over tonight." The woman said, "Be sure to remember, Uncle—I'll be waiting right here." The woman's attentions were most earnest and warm. Truly it was as the verse says:

Between uncle and sister-in-law, strict are the bounds of propriety—

Yet a helping hand may know when rules must bend.

The hero thinks only of the branches that share one root,

While the lustful woman dreams of twin lotus blooms on a single stem.

Wu Song took leave of his brother and sister-in-law, left Purple Stone Street, and made his way straight to the county seat. It happened that the magistrate was then holding court in the hall. Wu Song came forward and reported: "Wu Song has an elder brother who has moved to live on Purple Stone Street. Wu Song wishes to stay at his home, so that he may attend at the yamen morning and evening to await orders. I dare not absent myself without permission; I beg Your Honor's instruction." The magistrate said: "This is an act of filial piety and fraternal duty — how could I stand in your way? You may come to the yamen each day to attend." Wu Song thanked him, packed up his baggage and bedding. He had the newly made clothes and the things he had previously been given as rewards loaded onto a soldier's back, and Wu Song led him to his brother's house. When the woman saw all this, she was more delighted than if she had found a treasure in the middle of the night, and she put on a smiling face. Wu Da called a carpenter and had a room fixed up on the upper floor, with a bed laid out inside, a table, two low stools, and a brazier. Wu Song first settled his baggage and told the soldier to go back on his own. That evening he slept at his brother's house. Early the next morning, the woman got up in a hurry, heated water for washing his face and ladled out water for rinsing his mouth. She told Wu Song to wash his face and mouth, wrap his head in a kerchief, and then go to the yamen to sign the attendance register. The woman said: "Brother-in-law, when you have signed the register, come back early to eat — don't eat anywhere else." Wu Song said: "I'll come straight back." He went to the yamen, signed the register, and waited through the morning, then returned home. The woman washed her hands, cleaned her nails, and in neat and proper order prepared a meal. The three of them sat together at the table to eat. After Wu Song finished his meal, the woman with both hands offered a cup of tea to Wu Song. Wu Song said: "This puts my sister-in-law to too much trouble — Wu Song cannot rest easy eating and sleeping like this. Let the yamen assign a soldier to attend me." The woman cried out repeatedly: "How can Brother-in-law be so distant? We are flesh and blood — it's not as if I were serving someone else. Even if you were to assign a soldier to wait on you, that fellow would be filthy around the stove and pans — I couldn't stand the sight of such a person." Wu Song said: "In that case, I put my sister-in-law to trouble." Enough of this. From the time Wu Song moved into the house, he gave some silver to Wu Da to buy fried dough twists, tea, and fruit, and invited the neighbors to tea. The neighbors each contributed a share to present gifts to Wu Song, and Wu Da in return hosted a return feast — all this need not be told.

After a few days, Wu Song took out a piece of colored satin and gave it to his sister-in-law to make clothes. The woman said with a smile: "Brother-in-law, how can I accept this? But since you give it to me, I dare not refuse — I can only take it." From then on Wu Song lodged only at his brother's house. Wu Da as before went out into the street carrying his tray to sell steamed cakes. Wu Song each day went to the yamen to sign the register and attend to whatever duties were assigned. Whether he returned late or early, the woman prepared meals with the greatest cheer and waited on Wu Song with delight. Wu Song felt rather embarrassed. The woman often made provocative remarks to him, but Wu Song was a man of firm and straightforward temper and took no offense.

Where there is much to say, it is long; where there is little, it is short. Before they knew it, more than a month had passed, and it was now November. Day after day the north wind blew harder; dark clouds gathered on all sides, and soon, thick and fast, a great snow began to fall all through the sky. How fine the snow was! As the verse says:

Her glances drift and flutter, borne by the wind;

Willow fluff clings to the mud as if by secret design.

In wanton lightness the powdery world is bewitched —

Even the clouds and rain of Wu Shan cannot compare.

That day the snow fell straight through the first watch of the night, until the world seemed paved with silver and the whole universe ground from jade. The next morning, Wu Song went out early to report for roll call at the county office and did not return until midday. Wu Da had been driven out by the woman to go peddling. She asked the neighbor, Dame Wang, to buy some wine and meat, then went to Wu Song's room and lit a brazier of charcoal. She thought to herself, "Today I'll really try to seduce him and see if I can't stir his feelings..." The woman stood alone, cold and forlorn, beneath the curtain, waiting. Then she saw Wu Song returning, treading through the scattered jade and shattered pearls of snow. She lifted the curtain and greeted him with a smiling face: "Brother-in-law, you must be cold." Wu Song said, "Thank you for your concern, sister-in-law." When he entered, he took off his felt hat. The woman reached out both hands to take it, but Wu Song said, "Don't trouble yourself, sister-in-law." He brushed the snow off himself and hung the hat on the wall. He untied the pouch from his waist, took off his parrot-green silk-padded jacket, and went into his room to hang it up. The woman said, "I've been up since early—why didn't you come back for breakfast?" Wu Song said, "An acquaintance in the county invited me to breakfast. Then another friend pressed me to drink, but I couldn't stand it, so I came straight home." The woman said, "In that case, warm yourself by the fire." Wu Song said, "All right." He took off his oiled boots, changed into a pair of socks, put on warm shoes, pulled up a stool, and sat down by the fire. The woman bolted the front door and closed the back door, then brought some appetizers, fruits, and vegetables into Wu Song's room and set them on the table. Wu Song asked, "Hasn't my brother come home yet?" The woman said, "Your brother goes out to peddle every day. Let you and I have a few cups together." Wu Song said, "Let's wait for my brother to come home." The woman said, "How can we wait for him! There's no waiting for him!" She had hardly finished speaking when she warmed a flask of wine. Wu Song said, "Sister-in-law, sit down. Let Wu Er go and pour the wine." The woman said, "Brother-in-law, please help yourself." She also pulled up a stool and sat near the fire. On the table by the brazier were cups and dishes. The woman took a cup of wine, held it in her hand, and looked at Wu Song. "Brother-in-law, drink this cup dry." Wu Song took it and drained it in one gulp. The woman poured another cup and said, "The weather is cold—drink a paired cup, brother-in-law." Wu Song said, "Sister-in-law, please yourself." He took it and drained it again. Wu Song then poured a cup and offered it to the woman. She took it and drank, then picked up the flask and poured another cup, setting it before Wu Song.

The woman bared her chest slightly, let her cloud-like hair fall half loose, and with a smile on her face said, "I heard someone say that you keep a singing girl on East Street in front of the county office. Is that really true?" Wu Song said, "Sister-in-law, don't listen to outsiders' nonsense. Wu Er has never been that kind of man." The woman said, "I don't believe it. I'm afraid your mouth doesn't match your heart." Wu Song said, "If sister-in-law doesn't believe me, just ask my brother." The woman said, "What does he know! If he knew about such things, he wouldn't be selling steamed cakes anymore. Brother-in-law, have another cup." She poured three or four cups in succession, and he drank them all. The woman had also had three cups, which stirred her spring heart. She could no longer contain herself and kept making idle talk. Wu Song understood eight or nine parts of it and kept his head lowered.

The woman got up to warm more wine. Wu Song sat in the room, taking up the fire tongs to tend the coals. The woman brought a warmed flask of wine into the room, holding the flask in one hand while with the other she gave Wu Song's shoulder a pinch. "Brother-in-law, aren't you cold wearing so few clothes?" Wu Song was already half displeased and did not answer her. When she saw he would not respond, she snatched at the fire tongs. "Brother-in-law, you don't know how to tend the fire. Let me do it for you—I just want it to stay as warm as a brazier." Wu Song was now eight parts agitated but said nothing. The woman's desire burned like fire. Paying no mind to Wu Song's irritation, she put down the fire tongs, poured a cup of wine, took a sip herself, and leaving more than half, looked at Wu Song and said, "If you have the heart, drink this half cup of my leftover wine."

Wu Song snatched it from her and dashed it on the ground. "Sister-in-law, have some shame!" He gave her a push with his hand and nearly knocked her over. Wu Song glared and said, "Wu Er is a man who stands upright between heaven and earth, a man of honor—not some beast who violates propriety and destroys human decency. Sister-in-law, don't carry on so shamelessly. If I hear the slightest rumor, my eyes will know you as my sister-in-law, but my fists will not know you as my sister-in-law! Don't ever do this again!" The woman's face flushed crimson. She gathered up the cups and dishes and said, "I was only having a bit of fun—it's not worth getting so angry about. What a way to treat a person!" She cleared away the serving dishes and went off to the kitchen. A poem bears witness:

Wine served as go-between, lust emboldened the heart,

Giving herself to lechery, heedless of moral law.

She sought the clouds and rain right there at the table,

And roused instead a thunderclap of rage.

Now Pan Jinlian had tried to seduce Wu Song but failed, and instead received a harsh rebuke. Wu Song sat in his room, seething with anger. It was still early—not yet the hour of wei—when Wu Da came back, carrying his yoke of goods. He pushed open the door, and the woman hurriedly let him in. Wu Da entered, set down his yoke, and went straight to the kitchen. He saw that his wife's eyes were red from crying.

Wu Da said, "Who have you been quarreling with?"

The woman replied, "It's all because of your weakness that an outsider dared bully me."

Wu Da asked, "Who would dare bully you?"

The woman said, "As if I don't know! That wretch Wu Er—when I saw him come back in the snow, I quickly prepared wine and invited him to eat. He saw that no one else was around and began to make improper advances toward me."

Wu Da said, "My brother is not that sort of man. He has always been upright. Don't raise your voice—you'll have the neighbors laughing at us!"

Leaving his wife, Wu Da went to Wu Song's room and called out, "Second Brother, you haven't had any refreshments. Let's eat something together."

Wu Song made no reply. After pondering for a while, he took off his silk shoes again, put on his oiled leather boots once more, donned his outer jacket, placed his felt hat on his head, slung his traveling bag over one shoulder, and headed out the door.

Wu Da called, "Second Brother, where are you going?"

But Wu Song gave no answer and went straight on his way.

Wu Da returned to the kitchen and asked his wife, "I called him and he didn't answer. He just headed off toward the road in front of the county office. Whatever is the matter?"

The woman cursed, "You muddled fool—what's so hard to figure out? That wretch was ashamed and couldn't face you, so he left. I bet he's already sent someone to move his belongings and won't be staying here anymore."

Wu Da said, "If he moves out, people will laugh at us."

The woman retorted, "That muddled ghost—he tried to seduce me, and he's afraid of people's gossip? If you want to, go talk to him yourself, but I won't put up with this. Just give me a writ of divorce, and you can keep him all to yourself."

Wu Da did not dare say another word.

While the two of them were bickering at home, Wu Song arrived with a soldier carrying a bamboo pole. He went straight to the room, gathered his belongings, and headed out the door.

Wu Da rushed out and called, "Second Brother, why are you moving out?"

Wu Song said, "Brother, don't ask. If I told you, it would only bring you shame. Just let me go my own way."

Wu Da dared not press him further and let Wu Song move out. The woman inside muttered curses: "Well, that's fine! People will say a man made a chief constable—his own brother—and yet he can't even support his elder brother and sister-in-law, and instead comes back to torment us! Truly 'a flowered papaya—beautiful but hollow.' You've moved out—thank heaven and earth that this enemy is out of my sight."

Seeing his wife curse like this, Wu Da didn't know what to do. He felt a deep, gnawing unhappiness and couldn't let it go. Since Wu Song had moved to lodge at the county yamen, Wu Da went out every day as before to sell his cakes on the street. He had wanted to go to the county office to find his brother and talk to him, but the woman had repeatedly warned and instructed him not to go looking for him, so Wu Song dared not seek him out.

Time slipped by like flowing water. Before they knew it, the snow had cleared, and more than ten days had passed.

Now, the county magistrate had been in office for over two and a half years and had amassed a considerable amount of gold and silver. He wanted to send it to Tokyo to be stored and used by his relatives, and to help secure a promotion. But he feared it might be robbed on the road and needed a capable, trustworthy man to escort it.

Suddenly he thought of Wu Song: "This is the man for the job—such heroic ability!"

That day he summoned Wu Song to the yamen and discussed the matter: "I have a relative living in Tokyo. I want to send a load of gifts there, along with a letter of inquiry and good wishes. I'm only afraid the journey is unsafe and need a man of your heroic caliber to undertake it. Don't refuse this hardship—go on this mission for me, and when you return, I will reward you handsomely."

Wu Song replied, "This humble one has received Your Honor's favor—how could I decline? Since I have been so ordered, I must go. I have never been to Tokyo myself, so I can take the opportunity to see the sights while I'm there. Have everything prepared, sir, and we can set out tomorrow."

The magistrate was greatly pleased. He treated Wu Song to three cups of wine, and that is all on that subject.

Now, Wu Song received the magistrate's instructions and left the county office. He went to his lodgings, took some silver, called a soldier, and went out to the street to buy a bottle of wine along with fish, fruit, and other provisions. He went straight to Purple Stone Street and arrived at Wu Da's house. Wu Da had just returned from selling his cakes and found Wu Song sitting at the gate. He told the soldier to go to the kitchen and prepare the food.

The woman's old feelings had not faded. Seeing Wu Song arrive with wine and food, she thought to herself: "Could it be that he's been thinking of me and has come back?... He couldn't overpower me before—I'll just question him slowly and see."

The woman went upstairs, freshened her powder and rouge, rearranged her cloud-like hair, and changed into more colorful clothes. Then she came downstairs to greet Wu Song at the door.

She bowed and said, "Brother-in-law, what misunderstanding was there? You haven't come by for several days, and I've been at a loss. Every day I've had your elder brother go to the county office to find you and invite you to talk, but he always comes back saying, 'I couldn't find him.' How glad I am that you've come today! Why spend money on all this for no reason?"

Wu Song replied, "I have something I especially wish to tell you and my brother."

The woman said, "In that case, come upstairs and sit down."

The three arrived at a guest room upstairs. Wu Song had his elder brother and sister-in-law sit in the seats of honor, while he pulled up a stool and sat crosswise at one end. The soldiers carried the wine and meat upstairs and set them on the table. Wu Song urged his brother and sister-in-law to drink. The woman kept casting glances at Wu Song, while Wu Song kept drinking. After five rounds of wine, Wu Song asked for a serving cup. He had a soldier pour him a cup of wine, which he held in his hand. Looking at Wu Da, he said, "Elder Brother, please hear me: today Wu Er has been sent by the county magistrate on business to the Eastern Capital. I must set out tomorrow. It will be at least two months, or perhaps forty or fifty days before I return. I have something special to say to you: you have always been gentle and weak. While I am away, I fear outsiders may bully you. If you normally sell ten trays of steamed buns each day, from tomorrow onward, only make five trays to sell. Go out later and come home earlier each day, and do not drink with others. When you return home, lower the blind, close the front door early, and you will avoid much trouble and gossip. If anyone bullies you, do not argue with them. Wait until I return, and I will settle accounts with them myself. If you agree to follow my words, drain this cup."

Wu Da took the wine and said, "My brother speaks wisely. I will do as you say." They finished one round of wine.

Wu Song poured a second cup and said to the woman, "Sister-in-law is a shrewd person, so I need not say much. My elder brother is simple and honest; he relies entirely on you to manage the household and look after him. As the saying goes, 'A strong exterior is not as good as a strong interior.' If you keep the household in order, what troubles can my elder brother have? Have you not heard the old saying, 'When the fence is secure, no dog can enter'?"

When the woman heard these words, having been addressed so directly by Wu Song, a flush of red spread from her ears, and her face turned purple with rage. Pointing at Wu Da, she cursed: "You filthy fool! What words did you say to an outsider, coming back to bully me? I am a woman who could stand without a man's headband—a resolute, ringing-voiced wife! A person who can stand on her own fists, ride on her own arms, and hold her own in any company—not some spineless, useless creature. Since I married Wu Da, not so much as an ant has dared enter the house. What fence is not secure? What dog could get in? You babble nonsense—every word must have its consequence; every brick and tile you drop must hit the ground."

Wu Song smiled and said, "If only my sister-in-law would manage things thus—that would be best. Just make sure your heart matches your mouth, and that what you say is what you truly think. Since you say so, Wu Er will remember your words. Please drink this cup."

The woman pushed the wine cup aside and ran straight downstairs. Halfway down the staircase, she turned and shouted: "You may be clever and sharp, but do you not know the saying, 'An elder sister-in-law is like a mother'? When I married Wu Da, I never heard that I had an uncle! Where did you come from? Whether we are kin or not, you presume to play the master of the house. It is my own bad luck—damn it, I have run into nothing but trouble!" She wept her way downstairs. A poem bears witness:

Kind words, ill received, become enmity;

Laughing eyes at once give way to flowing tears.

It is but two streams of wanton ruin,

Born neither of sorrow nor of shame.

Now then, the woman put on many a false and affected display, and the two brothers, Wu Da and Wu Song, drank a few cups. Wu Song took leave of his elder brother. Wu Da said, "Brother, go now! Return soon, and we shall see each other again." As he spoke, tears fell from his eyes before he could stop them. Seeing the tears in Wu Da's eyes, Wu Song said, "Elder Brother, if need be, you need not even do your selling. Just stay at home. I will send you money for expenses." Wu Da saw Wu Song downstairs. As they reached the door, Wu Song said again, "Elder Brother, do not forget my words."

Wu Song led the soldiers back to the county office to make his preparations. Early the next morning, he packed his bundle and went to see the county magistrate. The magistrate had already ordered a cart loaded with his boxes and trunks, assigned two sturdy soldiers from the county, and two trusted attendants from the yama, all of whom he had given their instructions. The four followed Wu Song. They took leave of the magistrate before the hall, girded themselves, took up their broadswords, and escorted the cart. The five men left Yanggu County and set out on the road to the Eastern Capital.

Let the story divide here. Ever since Wu Song had spoken and departed, Wu Dalang endured being scolded by that woman for three or four days straight. Wu Dalang swallowed his anger and let her rant as she pleased. In his heart, he followed his brother's advice exactly: each day he truly made only half the usual number of steamed buns to sell, and returned home before evening. The moment he set down his carrying pole, he would lower the blind, close the front gate, and sit at home. When the woman saw this, she grew agitated and cursed Wu Da to his face: "Muddled fool! I have never seen the sun at high noon and yet the door of death already closed! Even if we must keep ghosts out, must we let others say our house is haunted? Listening to your brother's bird-brained talk—don't you fear others will laugh at us?" Wu Da said, "Let them laugh and say we keep ghosts out. My brother spoke good words and saved us much trouble." The woman said, "Bah! Fool! You are a man—why do you not make your own decisions, but let others order you about?" Wu Da waved his hand and said, "Let it be. His words are golden." More than ten days after Wu Song left, Wu Da went out later and returned earlier each day. When he came home, he closed the door. The woman quarreled with him several times, but after a while she grew used to it and thought nothing of it. From then on, whenever Wu Da was about to return, she would lower the blind and close the front gate ahead of time. When Wu Da saw this, he was pleased in his heart and thought, "This is just as it should be!"

After another two or three days, winter was drawing to a close and the sky had turned slightly warm with the returning sun. That day, Wu Da was about to return home, and the woman, as was her habit, went ahead to the doorway to prop up the curtain with its forked pole. As fate would have it, just then a man happened to pass by the edge of the curtain. As the old saying goes: "No tale is told without coincidence." The woman had not been holding the forked pole firmly; it slipped from her hand and fell—and would you believe it—it struck the man squarely on his headscarf. The man stopped in his tracks and was just about to make an angry scene, but when he turned and saw that it was a woman of bewitching beauty, half his body melted away at once. His anger straight through the "Kingdom of Java" it went, and his face broke into a broad smile. The woman realized she was in the wrong, pressed her hands together, and offered a deep curtsy, saying, "This woman's hand slipped by mistake. Please, sir, do not take offense."

The man straightened his headscarf with one hand while bowing at the waist with the other, returning the greeting: "No harm done. Please, madam, go your way as you please."

But all this had been seen by the next-door neighbor, Old Mother Wang. The old woman had been watching from beneath the curtain of her teahouse and laughed: "Now who told the young master to walk along the eaves? What a perfect hit!"

The man laughed and said: "Indeed, it was my fault. I've offended the lady. Please don't take offense."

The woman replied: "Sir, please don't blame me."

The man smiled again and gave a grand, sweeping bow: "This one would not dare."

Those two eyes, however, never left the woman's body. Even as he turned to leave, he looked back seven or eight times, swaying and swaggering off with a wide, rolling gait.

The woman took in the forked pole and the curtain, closed the gate, and waited for Wu Da to return. A poem says it well:

When the fence is not secure, dogs will slip through;

She drew the curtain—face to face, a fine view.

Old Mother Wang, don't fail your talent for seduction—

Trust that the forked pole was a fishing rod too.

Now, who was this man, and where did he live? His original name was Ximen Qing—a down-and-out wealthy man from Yanggu County who ran a medicine shop in front of the county offices. He had always been a crafty sort and was skilled in boxing and staff-fighting. Having recently come into money, he had taken to meddling in county affairs: extorting people, brokering deals, squeezing bribes, and framing officials. For this reason, the whole county gave him a wide berth.

His surname was Ximen, his given name was Qing, and he was the eldest son, so people called him Big Brother Ximen. Having lately grown rich, they now called him Master Ximen.

Before long, Ximen Qing came striding around into Old Mother Wang's teahouse and sat down behind the inner curtain. Old Mother Wang laughed: "Young master, that was quite a grand bow you gave just now!"

Ximen Qing also laughed: "Mother, come here. Let me ask you: who is the husband of that woman next door?"

Old Mother Wang said: "She is the younger sister of King Yama and the daughter of the Five Generals of the Underworld. Why do you ask?"

Ximen Qing said: "I'm speaking to you seriously. Don't make fun of me."

Old Mother Wang said: "How could you not know, young master? Her husband is the one who sells cooked food in front of the county offices every day…"

Ximen Qing said: "Could she be the wife of Xu the Third, who sells jujube cakes?"

Old Mother Wang shook her hand: "No. If she were, they'd be a perfect match. Guess again, young master."

Ximen Qing said: "The wife of Li the Second, the silver-pole carrier?"

Old Mother Wang shook her head: "No. If she were his, they'd be a fine pair too."

Ximen Qing said: "Then could she be the wife of Little Lu the Tattooed-Arms?"

Old Mother Wang laughed loudly: "No, if she were his, they'd be another perfect pair. Guess once more, young master."

Ximen Qing said: "Mother, I truly cannot guess."

Old Mother Wang cackled: "Well, let me tell you, young master, and give you a laugh. Her 'old man' is none other than Wu Da the Eldertree, who sells steamed cakes on the street."

Ximen Qing stamped his foot and laughed: "Could it be the Wu Da they call 'Three-Inch Dung-Bark Tree'?"

Old Mother Wang said: "That's the one."

When Ximen Qing heard this, he cried out in exasperation: "A fine piece of mutton—how could it have fallen into a dog's mouth!"

Old Mother Wang said: "It is indeed a bitter thing. As the old saying goes: 'A noble horse carries a fool on its back; a beautiful wife sleeps beside a clumsy husband.' The Old Man Under the Moon was determined on this match!"

Ximen Qing said: "Mother Wang, how much tea money do I owe you?"

Old Mother Wang said: "Not much. Let it rest a while, and we'll settle up later."

Ximen Qing said again: "Who has your son gone off with?"

Old Mother Wang said: "It's hard to say. He went with a merchant to Huai River and hasn't returned to this day. I don't know if he's alive or dead."

Ximen Qing said: "Why don't you have him follow me instead?"

Old Mother Wang smiled: "If the young master were to take him under his wing, that would be splendid indeed."

Ximen Qing said: "When he returns, we'll discuss it further."

After exchanging a few more pleasantries, he thanked her and got up to leave.

Scarcely two hours had passed when Ximen Qing again turned up and sat down beside the curtain at Old Mother Wang's shop door, facing the gate of the Wu residence. After a while, Old Mother Wang came out and said, "Would the honorable gentleman care for a plum soup?" Ximen Qing replied, "That would be lovely—make it extra sour." Old Mother Wang prepared a plum soup and handed it to Ximen Qing with both hands. He sipped it slowly, then set the saucer on the table.

Ximen Qing said, "Mother Wang, you make a fine plum soup. How much of it do you have in the house?" Old Mother Wang laughed. "This old matchmaker has spent her whole life arranging marriages—when would she have a husband in her house?" Ximen Qing said, "I was asking about the plum soup, and you talk about matchmaking—you've missed the point entirely." Old Mother Wang said, "I only heard the honorable gentleman say the matchmaking was well done, so I assumed he was speaking of my matchmaking." Ximen Qing said, "Mother, since you are a go-between, arrange a good match for me too. I'll reward you handsomely." Old Mother Wang said, "Honorable gentleman, what if your principal wife at home finds out? How could this old woman's face survive the slaps?" Ximen Qing said, "My principal wife is the best—remarkably tolerant. She's already taken in several concubines, but none of them suit me. If you know of someone suitable, recommend her by all means. Even a woman with a past would do, as long as she pleases me." Old Mother Wang said, "There was one the other day who would have been just right, but I'm afraid the gentleman wouldn't want her." Ximen Qing said, "If she's good, arrange it for me and I'll reward you." Old Mother Wang said, "She's a woman of the finest appearance, but a bit advanced in years." Ximen Qing said, "A year or two older doesn't matter. How old is she exactly?" Old Mother Wang said, "She was born in the year of wuyin—she's a Tiger—and she's just turned ninety-three this New Year." Ximen Qing laughed and said, "Look at this crazy old woman—she just wants to pull faces and make jokes." Ximen Qing laughed and rose to leave.

As the sky grew dark, Old Mother Wang had just lit the lamp and was about to close up when Ximen Qing turned up again. He went straight to the seat beneath the curtain and sat down, gazing steadily toward the gate of the Wu residence. Old Mother Wang said, "Would the gentleman care for a 'Harmony Soup'?" Ximen Qing said, "That would be lovely. Make it sweet, Mother." Old Mother Wang prepared a cup of Harmony Soup and handed it to Ximen Qing to drink. He sat there for a while, then rose and said, "Mother, keep the account—I'll settle the bill tomorrow all at once." Old Mother Wang said, "No trouble at all. Rest well, and please do come again tomorrow morning." Ximen Qing laughed and left again.

Nothing more happened that night. The next day at dawn, Old Mother Wang had just opened the door and looked out when she saw Ximen Qing pacing back and forth in front of the shop again. Old Mother Wang said to herself, "This rascal is persistent. Watch me smear some sweet honey on this fellow's nose—he won't be able to lick it off. He's used to getting the better of people in the county; let him come and lose out in this old woman's hands." For this Old Mother Wang who ran a tea shop was herself no virtuous sort. Truly this old woman:

Her words deceive Lu Jia, her tongue surpasses Sui He.

A lone phoenix and a single lark—in an instant paired as mates;

Widows and widowers—with a single speech she sets them on each other.

With a clever scheme she makes an Arhat embrace a nun;

With a little trick she has the Heavenly King clutch the Demon Mother.

With sweet persuasion, even a man like Feng She is moved;

With soft coaxing, even a woman like Magu is stirred.

She incurs the Weaver Maid to suffer longing, and coaxes the Moon Goddess to seek a mate.

Now Old Mother Wang had just opened the shop and was in the tea room, banking the fire and arranging her tea pots, when she saw Ximen Qing pacing outside since dawn several times over. He then made straight for the tea room and sat down beneath the curtain, watching the curtained doorway of the Wu residence. Old Mother Wang pretended not to see him and busied herself fanning the brazier in the tea room, not coming out to offer tea. Ximen Qing called, "Mother, bring me two cups of tea." Old Mother Wang answered, "The gentleman is here! We haven't seen much of you lately—please sit down." She prepared two strong cups of ginger tea and brought them to the table. Ximen Qing said, "Mother, sit and keep me company while I drink." Old Mother Wang laughed loudly. "I'm not a 'shadow matchmaker'!" Ximen Qing also laughed, then asked, "Mother, what does the neighbor next door sell?" Old Mother Wang said, "They sell steamed river-leakers, piping hot, warm, and extra spicy." Ximen Qing laughed and said, "Look at this old woman—always being crazy!" Old Mother Wang laughed. "I'm not being crazy—she has her own husband at home." Ximen Qing said, "Mother, let me speak seriously: since they make such excellent steamed buns there, I'd like to ask her for thirty or fifty. Do you know if she's out or at home?" Old Mother Wang said, "If you want to buy steamed buns, wait and get them when she comes back from the street—why go knocking on doors?" Ximen Qing said, "You're quite right." He drank his tea, sat a while, then rose and said, "Mother, keep the account." Old Mother Wang said, "No trouble at all. This old woman will write it carefully in the ledger." Ximen Qing laughed and left.

Wang Po kept watch from her tea shop, her sharp eyes following Ximen Qing as he passed by the door to the east again, then glanced back; came from the west, and glanced once more. He paced back and forth seven or eight times before finally walking straight into the tea shop. Wang Po said, "It's been an age since we've seen you, young master."

Ximen Qing smiled, pulled out a tael or so of silver from his person, and handed it to Wang Po. "Granny, take this in the meantime for tea money."

The old woman laughed. "Is it really so much?"

Ximen Qing said, "Just keep it."

The old woman was secretly delighted. "Here it comes—this fool is ripe for the taking," she thought. She hid the silver away and said, "I can see you're a bit thirsty, young master. How about some broad-leaf steeped tea?"

Ximen Qing said, "How did you guess, Granny?"

The old woman said, "What's so hard to guess? As the saying goes: 'Enter a door and ask not of fortunes lost or won—observe the face and you'll know it all.' I can guess even the strangest, most peculiar goings-on."

Ximen Qing said, "I have something on my mind. If you can guess it, I'll lose five taels of silver to you."

Wang Po laughed. "This old woman doesn't need three schemes and five guesses—one guess will hit it dead on. Young master, come close. These past two days you've been walking with purpose, coming and going frequently—you must be thinking of that woman next door. How's that for a guess?"

Ximen Qing laughed. "Granny, you are as wise as Sui He and as sharp as Lu Jia! I'll tell you honestly: ever since the day I saw her through the bamboo curtain, it was as if she'd gathered up my three souls and seven spirits. I just haven't had a way to get my foot in the door. Do you know any tricks?"

Wang Po burst out laughing. "I'll tell you the truth, young master: my tea business is what you'd call 'a ghost keeping watch.' Three years ago, on the third day of the sixth month when it snowed, I sold a pot of tea—and haven't sold a single one since. I've had to rely entirely on 'odd jobs' to feed myself."

Ximen Qing asked, "What are 'odd jobs'?"

Wang Po laughed. "First and foremost, I'm a matchmaker. I'm also a procuress, I can be a midwife, I can deliver babies, I can talk of love and romance, and I can be a go-between."

Ximen Qing said, "Granny, if you can really help me pull this off, I'll give you ten taels of silver for your coffin money."

Wang Po said, "Now listen to me, young master: the two words 'illicit affair' are the hardest of all. Five things must be in place before it can work. First, the looks of Pan An; second, a donkey-sized instrument; third, money like Deng Tong's; fourth, the patience of a needle hidden in cotton; and fifth, plenty of leisure time. These five are called Pan, Donkey, Deng, Little, and Leisure. If you have all five, the affair will be yours."

Ximen Qing said, "I'll tell you honestly—I have all five. First, though my face may not match Pan An's, it's passable enough. Second, when I was young I raised a mighty turtle. Third, I have no shortage of strings of cash—though not as rich as Deng Tong, I'm well enough off. Fourth, I have the patience of Job—even if he beat me four hundred times, I'd never strike back. Fifth, I have plenty of leisure time—otherwise, how could I come so often? Granny, just make it happen for me. When it's done, I'll reward you handsomely."

Ximen Qing's intent was plain from his words. Wang Po said, "Young master, though you say you have all five, I know there's one thing that could still trip you up—it would probably bring everything down."

Ximen Qing said, "What's that one thing?"

Wang Po said, "Young master, don't take offense at my bluntness: the hardest part of an illicit affair is that even when nine parts out of ten are in place, if you've spent only nine taels and nine-tenths of a tael's worth of silver, it can still be hard to bring off. I know you've always been stingy—you don't like to spend money recklessly. That's the one thing that could trip you up."

Ximen Qing said, "That's the easiest thing to fix—I'll just follow your instructions."

Wang Po said, "If the young master is willing to spend, I have a plan that will get you and that woman face to face. But will you go along with me?"

Ximen Qing said, "Whatever it takes, I'll do it. What's your brilliant plan?"

Wang Po laughed. "It's late today—go home for now. Come back in six months or three months, and we'll talk it over."

Ximen Qing knelt down. "Granny, don't play games with me—just make it happen!"

Wang Po laughed. "You're getting nervous again, Your Honor. My plan is a sure bet. It may not earn a place in the Temple of Prince Wu Cheng, but it's better than Sun Wu drilling women soldiers—nine captures out of ten. Listen, Your Honor. This woman was originally the adopted daughter of a prominent family in Qinghe County, and she's an excellent seamstress. Buy a bolt of white silk, a bolt of blue silk gauze, a bolt of white cotton, and ten taels of good cotton floss, and bring them all to me. I'll go over there, ask for a cup of tea, and say to the wench, 'A patron has given me a set of materials for my burial clothes. I've come to borrow an almanac and ask you to pick a good day so we can hire a tailor.' If she ignores me when she hears this, forget the whole thing. But if she says, 'I'll do it for you,' and doesn't want me to hire a tailor, then we have one part of the light. I'll ask her to come to my house to work. If she says, 'Bring the things to my house,' and refuses to come over, forget the whole thing. But if she says joyfully, 'I'll come and do it—I'll even cut it for you,' then we have two parts of the light. If she's willing to work here at my place, I'll prepare some wine and refreshments for her. The first day, don't you come. The second day, if she says it's inconvenient and insists on taking the work home, forget the whole thing. But if she still agrees to work at my house, then we have three parts of the light. That day, don't you come either. Around noon on the third day, dress yourself up nicely and come over. Use a cough as your signal. Stand at the door and say, 'Why haven't I seen Auntie Wang these past few days?' I'll come out and invite you inside. If she sees you come in and gets up and runs away—how could I hold her back? Forget the whole thing. But if she sees you come in and doesn't move, then we have four parts of the light. Once you're seated, I'll say to the wench, 'This is the patron who gave me the burial clothes materials. I'm so indebted to him!' I'll praise you to the skies, and you can show off her needlework. If she doesn't respond or engage, forget the whole thing. But if she answers and speaks, then we have five parts of the light. I'll say, 'It's rare to find a woman who helps me like this. I'm indebted to both my patrons—one who provides the money, one who provides the labor. It's not that I'm begging as a go-between, but it's rare to find this woman here. Your Honor, be a good host and help me and the girl wash our hands.' Then you take out some silver and ask me to go buy things. If she bolts, how can I hold her? Forget the whole thing. But if she doesn't move, the matter is easy—we have six parts of the light. I'll take the silver and, just as I'm leaving, say to her, 'I'm grateful, miss, for keeping His Honor company for a while.' If she also gets up and goes home, how could I stop her? Forget the whole thing. But if she doesn't get up and leave, things are looking good—we have seven parts of the light. When I return with the things and set them on the table, I'll say, 'Miss, put your work aside and have a cup of wine. It's rare for this gentleman to spend his money so generously.' If she refuses to sit and drink with you and goes home, forget the whole thing. But if she only says she should leave but doesn't move, things are looking good—we have eight parts of the light. When she's drunk deeply and the conversation is flowing smoothly, I'll pretend we're out of wine and ask you to buy more. You'll then ask me to go buy it. I'll pretend to go out for wine, pull the door shut, and leave the two of you inside. If she panics and runs away, forget the whole thing. But if she lets me close the door without panicking, then we have nine parts of the light. Only one part of the light remains to complete the circuit. ... And that last part is the hardest. Your Honor, in the room, say a few sweet, refined things to her. But you mustn't be rough or start groping—if you spoil things, I won't help you. First, pretend to knock a pair of chopsticks off the table with your sleeve. Then, as you bend down to pick them up, reach out and give her foot a little squeeze. If she makes a fuss, I'll come to the rescue, but the matter will be ruined—you'll never get another chance. But if she doesn't make a sound, then we have the full ten parts of the light. She'll definitely be willing, and the whole thing can be accomplished. How is this strategy?"

Ximen Qing was overjoyed. "It may not earn a place on the Lingyan Pavilion, but it's a fine plan!"

Wang Po said, "Don't forget the ten taels of silver you promised me!"

Ximen Qing said, "If I get so much as a piece of orange peel to eat, I won't forget Lake Dongting! When can this plan be put into action?"

Wang Po said, "Tonight—you'll have your answer tonight. I'll go over now, before Wu the Eldest gets home, and carefully seduce her. Send someone over with the bolts of silk, gauze, and cotton, and the cotton floss."

Ximen Qing said, "If you accomplish this matter for me, how could I dare go back on my word?" He took leave of Wang Po and went to the silk shops in the market to buy the silk, gauze, cotton, and ten taels of fine, clear cotton floss. He had a servant at home wrap them in a bundle, took five taels of loose silver, and went straight to the tea shop. Wang Po received the goods and told the servant to go back. A poem says:

Is it mere rivalry of romance and desire?

A strange formation springs from the maze of enchantment.

Ten sides of the light-snaring scheme are laid—

Only to draw a doomed soul into the pit.

Old Mother Wang opened the back gate and went over to Wu Dalang's house. The woman received her and invited her upstairs to sit down. Old Mother Wang said, "Why doesn't the young lady come to this old woman's humble home for some tea?" The woman said, "It's just that these past few days I haven't been feeling well, and I've been too lazy to go out." Old Mother Wang said, "Does your household have an almanac? Lend it to this old body so I can look it over—I need to pick an auspicious day for cutting out clothes." The woman said, "What kind of clothes does Mother intend to make?" Old Mother Wang said, "This old woman is riddled with ailments—nine pains out of ten—and I'm afraid that when my time comes, I'll be laid low. I need to prepare some burial garments first. It's not easy to find a wealthy patron nearby, but when this old woman spoke of my situation, one of them gave me a set of fabrics—silk, satin, gauze, and brocade—along with some fine cotton. They've been sitting in my house for over a year, and I haven't been able to make them up. This year I feel my health declining worse than ever, and then this intercalary month happened along. I wanted to take advantage of these two days to get it done, but the tailor is holding me up, claiming he's too busy with work and won't come. This old woman simply can't bear this kind of hardship!" The woman listened and replied, "I'm afraid my work wouldn't suit Mother's taste. But if you don't mind, how about I take a hand and do it for you?" When the old woman heard these words, she beamed with smiles and said, "If the young lady would graciously make them for me, this old woman would die a happy death. I've long heard that the young lady is skilled with needle and thread—I just never dared to ask." The woman said, "There's no harm in it. Since I've promised Mother, I must finish the job for you. Take the almanac and have someone pick an auspicious day, and I'll set to work for you." Old Mother Wang said, "If the young lady is willing to make them for this old woman, the young lady is truly a lucky star—why bother picking a day? This old woman had someone check just the other day, and they said, 'Tomorrow is an auspicious day.' This old woman only thought that cutting clothes didn't require an auspicious day, so I didn't pay it any mind." The woman said, "Burial garments especially need an auspicious day—why pick any other?" Old Mother Wang said, "Since the young lady is willing to make them for this old woman, I'll be so bold as to ask the young lady to come to my humble home tomorrow." The woman said, "Mother, there's no need for that—why not bring the things here and I'll do them?" Old Mother Wang said, "This old woman also wants to watch the young lady at her work. Besides, I'm afraid there'd be no one at home to watch the front door." The woman said, "Since Mother puts it that way, I'll come after my meal tomorrow." The old woman thanked her profusely and went downstairs. That evening she reported to Ximen Qing, and they agreed she would come the next day. That night, nothing more happened.

The next morning at dawn, Old Mother Wang cleaned up her room, bought some thread and supplies, and arranged some tea and refreshments, waiting at home.

Now, Wu Dalang finished his breakfast, got his carrying pole ready, and went out to ply his trade. The woman hung up the curtain and went through the back gate to Old Mother Wang's house. The old woman was overjoyed beyond measure, received her into the room, and seated her. She brewed a strong cup of tea, sprinkled it with white pine nuts and walnut meat, and served it to the woman to eat. After wiping the table clean, she brought out the silk, satin, gauze, and brocade. The woman measured the lengths with her ruler, cut everything to completion, and began sewing. The old woman watched and exclaimed without stopping, "What marvelous skill! This old woman has lived sixty or seventy years and has truly never seen such fine needlework with my own eyes." The woman sewed until midday, when Old Mother Wang prepared some food and wine for her. She cooked a pound of noodles and served them to the woman. After eating, the woman sewed a while longer. As evening approached, she gathered up her work and went home.

As it happened, Wu Dalang returned at that moment, shouldering his empty carrying pole as he came through the door. The woman pulled the door open and lowered the curtain. Wu Dalang came into the room and saw that his wife's face was slightly flushed. He asked, "Where have you been drinking?" The woman answered, "Old Mother Wang next door asked me to make her burial garments, and at midday she prepared some refreshments for me." Wu Dalang said, "Ah! Don't eat his food. There are times when we need to ask him for favors too. If he's asked you to make some garments, and you come home and eat his refreshments, it's not worth bothering him about it. Tomorrow, if you go again, bring some money with you and buy some food and wine to return his kindness. As the saying goes, 'A distant relative is not as good as a close neighbor.' Don't neglect proper courtesy. If he refuses to let you repay him, just take the things home and make them there and return them to her." The woman listened, and that night she said nothing. A poem bears witness:

How hateful—the old bawd's scheme runs deep;

Great Lord Wu, muddled, knows not the cause.

She brings money to buy wine for the treacherous,

And delivers her wife to another man.

Now, Old Mother Wang's scheme was set, and she had lured Pan Jinlian to her home. The next day after the meal, once Wu Dalang had gone out, Old Mother Wang slipped over to invite her. She went to her room, brought out the work, and began sewing. Old Mother Wang brewed herself tea on the side and drank it—no need to speak of this. When midday approached, the woman took out a string of cash and gave it to Old Mother Wang, saying, "Mother, let me buy a cup of wine for us to drink." Old Mother Wang said, "Ah! How could there be such a thing? This old woman asked the young lady to come here and do work for me—how could I let the young lady spend her money?" The woman said, "It was my foolish husband who told me to come. If Mother takes offense, I'll just take the things home and make them and return them to you." The old woman listened and said repeatedly, "Great Lord Wu truly understands propriety. Since the young lady puts it that way, this old woman will accept it for now." The old woman was terrified of losing this opportunity, so she added her own money to buy some good wine, good food, and rare fruits, and served her with the greatest attentiveness.

Listen, good reader: in this world, no matter how shrewd a woman may be—eight parts out of ten—if someone flatters her and indulges her with small attentions, nine out of ten will fall for the trick. Moreover, Old Mother Wang prepared refreshments, invited the woman to eat and drink, and after she had sewed a while longer, as evening approached, the woman thanked her profusely and went home.

Enough of this. On the third day, after breakfast, the old woman Wang waited until Wu Da had gone out, then walked around to the back and called out: "Young lady, this old woman takes the liberty..." The woman came downstairs and said: "I was just about to come." The two saw each other and went into Old Woman Wang's room to sit down. She fetched the sewing work, and they began to stitch. The old woman promptly brewed a pot of tea, and the two drank it. The woman sewed until around noon, and meanwhile Ximen Qing had been waiting for this day as if it would never come. He wrapped a new headscarf around his head, put on a set of neat and proper clothes, took three or five taels of loose silver, and made his way straight to Purple Stone Street. When he reached the front of the tea shop, he coughed and called out: "Old Mother Wang—why haven't I seen you these past few days?" The old woman played along and answered: "Who's calling this old woman?" Ximen Qing said: "It's me." The old woman rushed out, looked at him, and laughed: "I wondered who it was—so it's our benefactor, the Honorable Gentleman. You've come at just the right time. Please, come inside and take a look." She tugged at Ximen Qing's sleeve and dragged him into the room, where she looked at the woman and said: "This is that benefactor—the gentleman who gave this old woman the fabric." Ximen Qing saw the woman and made a respectful bow. She hastily put down her sewing and returned the greeting with a curtsy.

Old Woman Wang then pointed at the woman and said to Ximen Qing: "It was most kind of you, sir, to give this old woman the bolts of silk, but they sat untouched for a whole year—I never got them made. Now I am indebted again to this young lady, who has taken the work and finished it for me. Her needlework is truly as fine as a loom's—tight and beautiful, really extraordinary! Honorable sir, just take a look." Ximen Qing picked it up and exclaimed in admiration. "How did this young lady learn such skillful handiwork? Her craft is like that of an immortal!" The woman laughed and said: "Please don't make fun of me, sir." Ximen Qing asked Old Woman Wang: "Old Mother, may I be so bold as to ask—whose household does this young lady belong to?" The old woman said: "Can you guess, sir?" Ximen Qing said: "How could this humble man possibly guess?" The old woman chuckled and said: "She is none other than the wife of your neighbor Wu Da-lang. You've forgotten how the pole pricked you the other day—not badly, I hope?" The woman flushed and said: "That day I made an honest mistake, sir. Please don't hold it against me." Ximen Qing said: "Not at all." Old Woman Wang jumped in: "This gentleman is good-natured through and through—he never holds a grudge. He's an excellent man." Ximen Qing said: "I didn't realize it before, but so she is the wife of Wu Da-lang. I always thought of Da-lang as a man who keeps his household together—he does business on the street, big and small, and has never wronged a single person. He knows how to make money, and he has a fine character—a truly rare man." The old woman said: "Indeed. Since the young lady married this Da-lang, she obeys him in everything." The woman said: "My husband is a worthless man. Please don't make fun of him, sir." Ximen Qing said: "You are too modest, my lady. The ancients said: 'Softness is the foundation of one's character, and hardness is the seed of disaster.' When a man as virtuous as your husband behaves so well, 'even ten thousand feet of water will not leak a single drop.'" Old Woman Wang beat the drum of encouragement: "Well said!"

After praising her for a while, Ximen Qing sat down across from the woman. The old woman said: "Young lady, do you know this gentleman?" The woman said: "I do not." The old woman said: "This gentleman is a wealthy man in this county. Even the magistrate associates with him. He is called Honorable Ximen. He possesses tens of thousands of strings of cash and runs a medicine shop in front of the county offices. His money piles higher than the Big Dipper; his rice rots in the granary. Red is gold, white is silver, round is pearl, and bright is jewel. He has horns from rhinoceros heads and tusks from elephant mouths..."

The old woman went on praising Ximen Qing, chattering on and on with false pretenses. The woman lowered her head and continued stitching. Ximen Qing, seeing Pan Jinlian, was consumed with desire and wished he could be with her then and there. The old woman brewed two cups of tea, handed one to Ximen Qing and the other to the woman, and said: "Young lady, show this gentleman some courtesy." After they drank the tea, their eyes began to exchange meaningful glances. The old woman looked at Ximen Qing and touched her own face with a hand. Ximen Qing understood the signal—he knew things were halfway there.

The old woman then said: "When the gentleman wasn't here, this old woman wouldn't dare come to your house to invite you. But now the conditions are right, and the timing is perfect. As the saying goes: 'One guest should not trouble two hosts.' The gentleman provides the money, and the young lady provides the labor. It's not that this old woman is meddling—it's simply that this young lady happens to be here, and the gentleman can play host. Help this old woman and the young lady wash your hands for the feast." Ximen Qing said: "I hadn't thought of that. Here's silver." He took it out, wrapped it in a handkerchief, and handed it to Old Woman Wang to prepare food and wine. The woman said: "There's really no need to go to such trouble." But though she said this, she did not get up. The old woman took the silver and went out. The woman still did not rise. The old woman, as she left, said: "I'm grateful to the young lady for keeping the gentleman company." The woman said: "That won't be necessary, Old Mother." But still she did not move. Such was fate—both of them had their minds made up. Ximen Qing's eyes never left the woman; and the woman's eyes stole glances back at Ximen Qing. Seeing such a fine figure of a man, she found herself five or seven parts willing, and lowered her head to go on with her sewing.

Before long, Old Woman Wang returned, having purchased some ready-made fat goose, cooked meat, and delicate pastries. She arranged everything on plates and dishes, and brought them into the room, setting them on the table. Looking at the young woman, she said, "My dear, put aside your work for a moment and have a cup of wine." The woman replied, "Mother, please help yourself. You entertain the gentleman—I don't presume." She remained where she was without stirring. The old woman said, "I did this especially for you to wash your hands, so why talk like that?" Wang Po arranged all the dishes on the table. The three sat down, and the wine was poured. Ximen Qing raised his cup and said, "My dear lady, drain this cup." The woman thanked him, saying, "I am deeply grateful for your kindness." Wang Po said, "This old woman knows that you are a hearty drinker. Please, relax and enjoy a couple of cups." A poem bears witness:

　　　　Since ancient times men and women do not share the same feast;

　　　　Selling coquetries and welcoming lechery is most pitiable.

　　　　She forgets the constable's words from days past—

　　　　The cur has now come right up to the fence.

And another poem:

　　　　Know that wine and lust are ever intertwined;

　　　　Food and drink can forge the bonds between man and woman.

　　　　No need for the constable's repeated warnings—

　　　　The fence is opened wide, awaiting the cur to come and sleep.

Now then, the young woman received the wine in her hand. Ximen Qing picked up his chopsticks and said, "Mother Wang, help me persuade our dear lady to have a little something." The old woman selected the best morsels and passed them over to the woman to eat. After three rounds of wine had been poured, the old woman went to warm more wine.

Ximen Qing said, "May I be so bold as to ask how many springs our dear lady has seen?" The woman replied, "This humble woman has idly passed twenty-three years." Ximen Qing said, "I am foolishly five years older." The woman said, "The gentleman compares himself to heaven and earth." Wang Po interjected, "What a fine and clever lady! Not only does she do excellent needlework, she is well-versed in all the schools of thought." Ximen Qing said, "Where else could one find such a treasure? Brother Wu the Elder is truly blessed!" Wang Po said, "It is not this old woman speaking out of turn, but the master's house has no end to women—where could one find another who could match this lady?" Ximen Qing said, "It is precisely this that is hard to put into words! It is only that my fate is thin, and I have never taken a worthy one." Wang Po said, "The master's first wife was fine." Ximen Qing said, "Let us not speak of it! Had my first wife been alive, things would not have fallen into such disorder—the household would not have been left masterless, the house left to collapse. Now I have three to five or seven mouths to feed, and none of them manages anything." The woman asked, "When did the gentleman lose his first wife?" Ximen Qing said, "It pains me to say. My first wife came from humble origins, yet she was clever and capable in every way—she managed everything for me. Now, unhappily, she passed away three years ago, and everything in the household has been topsy-turvy. Why do I always go out? When I am at home, I am vexed to no end!" The old woman said, "Master, do not take offense at this old woman's plain speech: your first wife could not match Sister Wu in needlework." Ximen Qing said, "Even my first wife could not compare to this lady in looks and bearing." The old woman said with a smile, "Sir, you keep a mistress on East Street. Why don't you invite this old woman over for tea?" Ximen Qing said, "That is Zhang Xixi, the slow-tune singer. I see she is a roadside performer—I'm not fond of her." The old woman said, "Sir, and Li Jiao-jiao—you've been with her a long time." Ximen Qing said, "I have taken her into my household. When she proves capable of managing the house, I will formally elevate her to principal wife." Wang Po said, "If someone suitable to the master's liking were to come to your house to speak of this, would there be any harm?" Ximen Qing said, "My father and mother are both gone. I decide for myself—who would dare say 'no'?" Wang Po said, "I was merely joking. Where would one hastily find someone to the master's liking?" Ximen Qing said, "Why should there not be one? I only regret that my bond with a wife has been thin, and I simply have not come across the right one."

Ximen Qing and the old woman exchanged words back and forth for some time. Then Wang Po said, "We are just getting to the good part of drinking, and the wine has run out. Do not blame this old woman's poor management—shall I buy another bottle?" Ximen Qing said, "I have five taels of loose silver in my handkerchief. I will leave it all with you. Whenever we want to drink, just take what you need, and the rest you may keep, Mother." The old woman thanked the gentleman. As she rose and glanced at the young woman, the cup of wine she had taken stirred the spring in her heart. Moreover, the two of them had been talking back and forth, and both were feeling the attraction. She kept her head down and did not rise. The old woman beamed and said, "This old woman will go fetch another bottle of wine, so that our dear lady may have another cup. I am obliged to ask our dear lady to keep the master company while I sit here. Is there wine left in the decanter? Then pour two more cups for the master. This old woman will go straight to the shop in front of the county office—they have good wine. I may be gone a while." The young woman said, "There's no need," but she remained seated and did not move. The old woman went out to the door, tied it with a cord, and then sat down in the passageway.

Ximen Qing, finding himself alone in the room with the woman, poured wine and pressed her to drink. As he did so, he brushed the table with his sleeve and sent the chopsticks clattering to the ground. By a curious twist of fate, they landed right at the woman's feet. Ximen Qing promptly crouched down to pick them up, and as he did, he noticed her tiny, pointed little feet, one of them resting right beside the chopsticks. Instead of retrieving them, he reached over and gave her embroidered shoe a squeeze. The woman burst out laughing and said, "Now, sir, don't make such a racket! Are you really trying to seduce me?" Ximen Qing at once dropped to his knees and said, "I only beg you, my lady, to take pity on this humble fellow." The woman then threw her arms around him and drew him close. There and then, in Wang Po's room, they loosened their garments and shared the same pillow, locked in pleasure. It was just like this: mandarin ducks intertwining their necks in play among the water, paired phoenixes threading side by side through the flowers. Joyfully, the intertwined branches of the union tree sprang forth; sweetly, the heart-tying sash was knotted. Pressing scarlet lips tightly together, nestling powdered cheeks at a slant. Silk stockings lifted high, revealing on the shoulders a crescent new moon; golden hairpins sliding loose, piling beside a pillow a cloud of dark tresses. Swearing oaths as firm as mountains and seas, they indulged in a thousand tender delights; shy as clouds, timid as rain, they rolled and pressed in ten thousand bewitching ways. The oriole's song lingered ceaselessly by the ear. Sweet saliva, delicious and warm, laughed and dripped from the tip of the tongue. The willow waist, soft and yielding, brimmed with the fullness of spring; the cherry lips, panting and gasping, breathed in soft little sighs. Starry eyes grew dim and drowsy; fine beads of sweat trickled down the fragrant jade. The creamy bosom rippled and swayed; dewy drops dripped gently from the heart of the peony. Even if matched in a proper lawful union, truly the taste of a stolen tryst is what is beautiful.

When the two had just finished their lovemaking and were about to straighten their clothes, Wang Po pushed open the door and walked in. "What a fine thing the two of you have done!" she declared. Ximen Qing and the woman both started in alarm. The old woman went on, "Well, well! I invited you here to make clothes—I never told you to come here and steal another woman's husband. If Wu the Elder finds out, I'll be dragged into it too. I'd better go report this to the authorities first." She turned to leave. The woman caught hold of her skirt and said, "Mother, spare me, I beg you!" Ximen Qing said, "Mother, keep your voice down." Wang Po said with a smile, "If you want me to spare you, you must each agree to one thing." The woman said, "Never mind one thing—even ten things, I'll do them all for you, Godmother." Wang Po said, "From this day on, you must keep it hidden from Wu the Elder and not miss an appointment. You must not disappoint the gentleman, and then I'll let the matter drop. But if you fail to come for even a single day, I'll tell your husband." The woman said, "I'll do just as you say, Godmother." Wang Po then said, "Master Ximen, I needn't say anything to you. This fine business of yours is already complete. But you must not go back on your word about what you promised. If you prove unfaithful, I'll tell Wu the Elder about that too." Ximen Qing said, "Godmother, rest assured—I would never go back on my word." The three of them drank a few more cups of wine. By then it was already afternoon. The woman rose to leave. "That fellow Wu will be coming home soon. I'd better go back myself." She slipped out through the back door and returned home. First she lowered the curtain over the front, and just then Wu the Elder walked in.

Now, Wang Po looked at Ximen Qing and said, "A fine piece of work, eh?" Ximen Qing said, "I truly owe it all to you, Godmother. As soon as I get home, I'll bring you a silver ingot. What I promised—how could I ever go back on that?" Wang Po said, "'Eyes fixed on the banner arriving, waiting only for good news.' Don't make me 'pay the professional mourner after the coffin has already been carried out.'" Ximen Qing laughed and left, and there we shall leave him.

From that day on, the woman slipped over to Wang Po's house every day and was with Ximen Qing. Their affection was as thick as lacquer, their hearts stuck fast as glue. As the old saying goes, "Good deeds stay behind closed doors; evil deeds travel a thousand li." In less than half a month, all the neighbors in the street knew about it. Only Wu the Elder remained in the dark. There is a poem that bears witness:

A tryst of half an hour—what good does it do?

Such common pleasures need not be boasted of.

One day disaster will rise within the household walls,

And you will regret this day, when you doted on wild flowers.

To break off this passage—the tale splits into two threads. Now, in this county there was a young lad of fifteen or sixteen, whose family name was Qiao. Because he was born and raised in Yunzhou while his father was serving in the army, he was given the name Yun Ge. He had only his old father at home. The boy was sharp and clever. He had always made his living selling fresh fruit in front of the county offices, at all the wine shops there, and Ximen Qing had often given him a bit of spending money. On this particular day, he had found a basket of pears and was carrying them through the street, looking for Ximen Qing. A certain busybody said to him, "Yun Ge, if you're looking for him, I'll show you where to find him." Yun Ge said, "No need to chatter, Uncle—just tell me where to find him. If I run into him, I might earn thirty or fifty cash to keep my father fed." The busybody said, "Ximen Qing has been carrying on with the wife of Wu the Elder, the cake seller. Every day he sits right in front of Aunt Wang's teahouse on Purple Stone Street. Chances are he's there right now. You're just a kid—go ahead and walk right in, no harm done."

Having received this advice, the boy thanked his uncle for the tip. The little monkey picked up his basket and made straight for Purple Stone Street, walking directly into the teahouse, where he found old Dame Wang sitting on a small stool spinning thread. Liegen set down his basket and, looking at Dame Wang, said, "Greetings, godmother." The old woman asked, "Liegen, what have you come here for?" Liegen said, "I'm looking for the great gentleman. I want to earn thirty or fifty cash to support my old father." The old woman said, "What great gentleman?" Liegen said, "Godmother, you know perfectly well which one. It's just that one." The old woman said, "Even the great gentleman has a name, doesn't he?" Liegen said, "It's a two-character name." The old woman said, "What two-character name?" Liegen said, "Godmother is just having fun with me. I need to speak a word with Lord Ximen." He started to head inside. The old woman seized him by the collar. "Little monkey, where do you think you're going? Other people's houses have their private and public parts." Liegen said, "I'll just go into the room and find him." Dame Wang said, "You wretched monkey! What would Lord Ximen be doing in my house?" Liegen said, "Godmother, don't hog the whole feast for yourself! Let me have a taste of the broth too! There's nothing I don't know!" The old woman cursed him, "You little monkey, what could you possibly know?" Liegen said, "You're 'cutting vegetables in a wooden ladle with a horseshoe knife'—water-tight, not a drop spills to the ground. You want me to say it outright? I'm afraid the steamed-cake-selling brother might lose his temper." These two remarks struck the old woman where it truly hurt. Furious, she barked, "You wretched monkey, coming into my house to fart and stink!" Liegen said, "I'm the little monkey, and you're a 'horse-pimp'!" The old woman grabbed Liegen and rapped him twice on the head with her knuckles. Liegen cried out, "Why are you hitting me?" The old woman cursed, "You thieving monkey! Raise your voice any higher and I'll slap you out the door with my big palm!" Liegen said, "Old biter, hitting me for no reason at all!" The old woman went at him, scolding with one hand and rapping his head with the other, driving him right out into the street, and she threw his basket of snow pears out after him. The basket burst open, the pears scattering in four directions and five, rolling this way and that. The little monkey was no match for the old bawd. Cursing with one mouth, crying with another, walking with one foot and gathering pears with the other, he pointed at Dame Wang's teahouse and shouted, "Old biter, I told you not to panic! I won't tell him!—but when it comes out, you'll believe!" He picked up his basket and went straight off to find this person. Truly, as the deeds of yesterday catch up with you, misfortune never travels alone. It would overturn the grass in the foxes' and rabbits' lair and startle the mandarin ducks sleeping on the sand. Just who was it that Liegen went to find? Listen to the explanation in the next chapter.